http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/22/adult-children
When dealing with parents as an adult, there is no way that you can ever be considered equals. There is never a time that I will ever be seen in my parents eyes as anything more than the fourteen year old teenage idiot that I was.
I've already talked about this a bit on the blog, but the short story about this is that although I have a masters degree, and although I am going to be teaching at LDS Business college starting in January, and although I'm married and have a kid, my parents, and my sisters to a lesser extent, will always see me as a stupid fourteen year old.
The reason behind this is that after fourteen, I started avoiding them.
That's right, I realized that the best way for me to not have to deal with them was by keeping myself hyper busy and never having to actually be with them. Having state orchestra, youth orchestra, swim team, and science olympiad, as well as DM-ing a campaign with friends not to mention a full load of honors and AP classes translated down to a very simple thing - I never saw my parents. As soon as I was able to control my own schedule and could control how often I was at home, I wasn't at home.
The further I got into high school, the less I dealt with them. There were times that I didn't see them for a long time, and there were even times that I hadn't seen my dad for an entire week, only to see him at church to miss him for another week.
After high school and avoiding them at all costs at all times, I went to college and avoided them, did the mission and avoided them, and finally went back to college, got married, and avoided them. I didn't want to deal with the stupidity of my family, because passive aggressive just gets too fun at some points, and so I avoided them. The only down side to this is that my family has had such little interaction with me, that they go off of when they last saw me, which was when I was 14, hence I will always be 14.
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