No Pressure

I just had this as an introduction to a classmate of mine in my teaching class-

" I work for the Federal government for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services. I work in communications, and I spend most of time editing and writing for websites. I’m one of the lead writers on both Medicare.gov and HealthCare.gov"

Yeah, no pressure trying to deal with a person who writes for THOSE websites. It only got worse from there. There are some times that I wonder what in the world I'm doing in these classes trying to act like an adult, and this is one of those times. 

Oh my, in my thesis class this is a direct copy and paste from the 'icebreaker' assignment. Typically written super informally, and not graded in any way shape or form.

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George Michael-Philip Zegalia

Professor Joe Fassler

ENG 549 – X2826

December 31, 2013

                                                                 ICEBREAKER

     My name as stated above is George Michael-Philip Zegalia.   I’m primarily working on a historical novel that was titled: Legend of Karen-Bluejeans,  or:  Legends of Karen- Bluejeans; but with this class I’ll probably simply call it: Karen Bluejeans.  The sub-title or part of the complete title will be: Maker of _____.  Maker of what?  I don’t know yet.  The story tells how the fourteen-years old Native American girl was very important to British General Wolfe’s victory over the French forces in Canada and the capture of Quebec City, which resulted in the dominance of the English language in the New World.  I’d welcome suggestions; so far the best that I’ve come up with is:  Maker of Nations.

     My chief KB influences have been American Heritage history books, Harvard’s Francis Parkman’s book about the French & Indian War, and the painting from Painter to King George III of England, Benjamin West’s:  Death of Wolfe (1770).  Influential too were other books on the subject and the Bi-Centennial celebrations of 1976 (the year I graduated with a Bachelor Degree from the University of California, Irvine).  [I was an English major.]  Oh, and also of considerable sustaining influence is the memory of a girl not greatly unlike Karen Bluejeans,  with whom,  I had experienced inchoate feelings of love.

                                                                                                               Page 2

       Among general literary influences I’ll name three:  Hermann Hesse (1877-1962)’ German Swiss author of several mystical novels’, such as Siddhartha (1922);  Ernest Hemmingway (1899-1961) and the writings of his sojourn in Paris, France, (where I have dwelt in rapturous bliss); and, either the Welsh  poet, Dylan Thomas (1914-53):

“In my craft or sullen art. .,”

or the Montreal Jew, Leonard Cohen (1934-20- -): Suzanne, Famous Blue Raincoat, Joan of Arc.

     The last book that I’ve read is the Harvard Lampoon parody, The Wobbit.  At present though I’m reading the second book of the Bounty Trilogy,  Men Against the Sea, by Charles Nordhoff & James Norman Hall; and I’ve read the Introduction to start The Oresteia by Aeschylus.

     Some of my personal goals for this class are to further my novel, and to get a toe-hole in the publishing edifice – at best, an agent or highly interested individual publisher.  I’d really appreciate a large advance that I could write and take care of an old polo pony whom I hold with deep affection.   Therefore, in the next eleven weeks, I hope to establish a rapport with professional people based upon my writings of Karen Bluejeans (Maker of _____).  And anything and everything in that direction is also desirable, and it will be gratefully accepted as a blessing.  -- GMZ

Let me be perfectly clear for anyone who doesn't understand what that says to everyone else in the class- "HELLO! I'm an overachiever that thinks they know everything, but doesn't even know basic MLA format! Don't help me out with anything, just give me the A+ and I'll be good to go!"

Seriously? Who uses the phrase "publishing edifice"?